My dog died last night. On Friday he ran of to the village and got into a fight over some female. He came back with a gash over his eye and sore as usual… He had done this before… But this time there was internal damage and this morning he was dead… I saw it coming as he got weaker and the bulge on this neck grew. I worried. Its never a good sign when you have to take a dogs collar off. I did that on Saturday when the bulge got bigger. I took it off and kind of said my goodbyes then, part of me already knew. And when it happened… there was even a sort of relief. It was over. No more worry. Just sadness.

…

It’s better this time. Ive lost a dog before. Delta was 9 months old when he ran under a truck. It hurt like hell then. When we took Rocky as a puppy I made it clear for myself - he is here only for a short while, love him, don’t cling to him. Their lives are so much shorter than ours anyway… Yes, perhaps this could have been prevented by keeping him chained up… But is that life? I would like to believe he had a full happy life with us as long as it lasted… And the best I can do is remember him.

…

There will be a new puppy in the house soon… It’s a farmhouse. We never go without for long. It will be a different natured creature, just like two people are different. It will live its own short life and die its own little death only to be followed by another puppy… Thus is life.

…

I’ve been watching Doctor Who lately… There is a strange analogy. The Doctor lives so long… And his companions are quite human. Their lives are to him like those of pets for us. He cares for them deeply, but it is inevitable that they die before him… But that inevitability does not stop him giving his heart or two to mortals again and again… And it will not stop me from loving another dog, and then another and then another as long as they stay with me…

…

So run with the pack under starry sky in heavens of dogs, my pet. Say my greetings to those who went before you. I will not forget you. Ever.

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